The assignment is to list three negitives and three postives per age unit. I found that I learned from this lesson that the past is truely the past when you truely have to search for the negitives to list only three. I also learned from this assignment it is a choice to witch you will foruc on when looking at the past.

Birth – 7 years old

                                                                                       I don’t remember a lot about these years.

Negitive

3- my mother tried to kill me and my brother

4 and ½- gave up my childhood to my uncle

Second grade teacher was mean and didn’t like me

Positive

Good or bad I was my mother’s baby doll, and gift to father

I felt loved by my uncle.

I was a bright child and loved learning.

These years was hard to think of anything for either negitive or positive

 

8 – 14 years old

Negative

Was sent to live in anut and uncle

My father made me his wife

My mother hated me and beat me

Positive

I stood up to my mother

I stood up to my uncle

I got to raise  my sister

During these years I began to become strong and stand up for myself.

15 – 21 years old

Negative

Moved to church foster homes, family home, state foster homes, group home.

Put out on my own when aged out of system.

Uncle betrayed my trust in him (different uncle than abused me)

Positive

I became a born again christian.

I went to collage

I graduated highschool

I fullfilled my love of learning during these years.

22 – 28 years old

Negative

Tried to kill myself, 7th, 8th and 9thtimes

Was Dxed MPD

Homeless in New York

Positive

I got married; learn to be loved and to love

Had my first child with the man I love

I learned MPD was good and accepted who I am

These years were intense years of learning to love and be loved.

29 – 35 years old

Negative

Left my family behind in California.

In and out of psycho hospital

Had an abortion, against my beliefs

Positive

Had Johnathan, Rachel, and Christopher

Found a wonderful therapist

Made a wonderful home in Ohio

These years were years of learning how to me a family, and healing.

36 – 42 years old

negative

Lost the man I married to an accident

Struggled to keep my family alive

9 men beat my husband nearly to death

Positive

I homeschooled my children

Workers comp kept my family afloat

I ended therapy and decide to live life

I learned during these years that when a unit sticks together they can make it thru anything.

43 – 49 years old

Negative

Drunk driver drove thru house

Struggled to get medical attention for hubby

Social security offset

Positive

Son graduated eight grade

Workers comp settlement

Brought house and fixed it up

I learned to be creative in my finiances and that if you want anything bad enough you can make it happen.

This assignment was simple to do because have worked so hard in the past to over come things. To be truthful I have worked for so long to forgive and let my past go that going back to find the negatives even just three seemed so hard. I rather spend
my time today making my life what I want it and live, than work on the past anymore. Yes there are times when things come up that still hurt but usually I am very quick to feel and process and forgive and move on. Alot of my healing
came from writing my books “Why’s Love so Hard” and “Happily everafter or maybe not” I no longer feel the need to relive or experince my past, I am working on renewing the relationship with my parents and choose to leave the rest of my abusers in the dust. They have to live what they have done but it doesn’t have to be my life. I enjoyed listing the positives of my years on this earth and might of went past three if I knew I was allowed too. I have learned along time ago to be grateful for everything and yes I mean everything that has happened in my life. It has made me the strong, individual that I am today. It wasn’t fun but well worth it 🙂

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About bttrflysprit

Mother, daughter, wife, sister, MPD/DID, woman, someones child, are some of my titles. I am who I am and I am learning to be happy with that.

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