I had all the tools but the begining was slow I couldn’t even look into the mirror to put on the make up. My daughter finally talked me into getting my hair cut, I havn’t had it cut by someone else in over 20 years and was extremely nervous. We went into the hair place inside walmart witch was lovely for her and a big mistake for me. The lady that cut her hair did a wonderful job and the lady that cut my hair more hacked it off leaving me not with a fresh renewed feeling at all but more a what have I gotten myself into. I backslided a bit and wouldn’t even think about the reinvention. It was with very tenitive feelings that I began the journaling a week later at first all the old tapes told me that I wasn’t good enough, that people wouldn’t want to read my journals that writing daily would push people away ect…. I pushed myself to write that first week, to add friends to my list. Funny thing is that one of the very first friends I added was Maia from YOU Universty she is the creator of an emotional basis life coaching and we really connected. Two days later I decided to quit drinking diet soda and was doing really well with it for the first week but backslide badly after that and thinking of attemping again as during that week I felt so free.

I was invited to a coaching call on Fridays and attended the first one as a dare to myself. I found myself laughing and giggling during the call something I havn’t done in a very long time. Gina dared me to laugh on purpose for a week. and I found that my days were begining to be filled with laughter a very strange thing for me. as that first week ended I decided to keep journaling and found myself at two more coaching calls so far both teaching me great things one to attemp an love letter to myself, and the other that it is okay to cry as tears can cleanse the emotions.  At the moment I am working on Trusting myself and nurturing myself. I am going to begin to keep a weekly road map of this journey here I hope any that read it will find it helpful, interesting, and encouraging to do the same.


About bttrflysprit

Mother, daughter, wife, sister, MPD/DID, woman, someones child, are some of my titles. I am who I am and I am learning to be happy with that.

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